Log in

No account? Create an account

(no subject)

"Nothing in this world can take the place of persistence. Talent will not: nothing is more common than unsuccessful men with talent. Genius will not; unrewarded genius is almost a proverb. Education will not: the world is full of educated derelicts. Persistence and determination alone are omnipotent."

-Calvin Coolidge

position of the day
I am the perpetual bad guy.
Oh course you are the good guy. Saving the day and shit. Being the smart guy.
The dude EVERYONE loves.
I know all your secrets. You're Achilles heel.
I can't admit any faults to you because you are so much better then me. You have already admitted your faults. You already know. You are above me.
I resent your attitude. I don't like that you think you are better informed them everyone. I find it really quite obscene. Short sighted. Limited.

the burning question
I want my day to to excite me like the first day of spring.
I want kissing to feel like cinnamon flavored heart shaped candy.
I want my next success to feel like reaching the summit of Kilimanjaro.
I want my body to feel like a ballerina in action.
I want smiling to feel like diamonds sparkling in the sun.
I want my friendships to feel like a warm fireplace on a a cold night.
I want my nervous system to feel like floating freely in a cool swimming pool.
I want my gigs to feel like 1,000 doves being released.
I want my neighborhood to feel like bees to flowers.
I want my integrity to feel like the one piece of furniture in your house that you just can't move no matter what.
I want my money-making to feel like watching my garden grow.
I want my word to feel like your favorite candle.
I want my laughter to feel as free and open as a child just let out of school for the summer.
I want the end of the day to feel like a purring cat getting curled up for a nap.
I want being of service to feel like a refreshing glass of ice water.
I want my philanthropy to feel like a dandelion just blown into the wind.
I want my challenges to feel how I do after my first cup of coffee.
I want my love to feel like the safety net that just caught you after an accidental fall.
I want my writing to feel like a watermelon in June.
I want my ideas to feel like the highest drop on a roller coaster.

lower and lower we go... where it will stop nobody knows!
just when it seems like there is nothing else to lose and new problem crops up.
we have been homeless since august. little my little our conveniences have been lost, broken, become unaffordable.
today's issue is that of no mirror. seems simple enough, but living without one for a few days and you really start to miss it. i wonder if people were more true to themselves when they did not have a constant reminder of their appearance.
anyhow, my wonderful android crashed. our computers have been down until just yesterday evening. i've been completely disconnected for weeks. i'm not all that bothered by it, but it does hinder work and the speed in which i retrieve information.
our trip back to tampa was dire. mentally abusive.
on a more interesting note we will be closing on the house either friday or early next week. i'm excited but i know this adventure is only starting, i've been through this too many times to with a home is this condition. we will do without much more before it starts to build up again.
gosh this post sounds sounds like a bitchfest. i think i am rather tired....

on the move again soon. i am taking the next few weeks before the shit hits the fan to just chill. i am pouring through my books at record speed and delving into my netflix queue headfirst. all is calm before the storm ;)
the day before yesterday i went to go check out our newest venture. i will have a choice of rooms for my hideaway office. i dare say i am favoring the bedroom downstairs toward the back of the house. a back door leads to the pool bath which is located next to said room, but i think i will find it tolerable. my other option is the 5th bedroom upstairs, also at the back of the house. it is fairly segregated but receives afternoon sun which i question. not to mention i am leery of marching my library up another flight of stairs again. yes, i do believe i have made up my mind.
my body is tired. i've been up at 4.30 am for three days in a row to go to the gym. i feel awesome, but i relish the though of waking up early tomorrow and having nothing to do but read... or write.

orange sunrise... pink sunset
i vacillate between light and dark. i sniff the sunshine, yet eat the night.
i know not my place. at ease i am in the obscure.. tucked away in my own disillusions. making yes out of what most consider no.
i feel drawn to enlightenment though. crisp and clean flowery goodness.
GAWD i am SUCH a libra.
i strive to find the balance. i can be so many people- i don't even need reason. in a way... i am everyone. i've licked every salt block and swam every river i have come into contact with. i live you and balance me.
i will openly share my secrets, but i make it a game to find them. i love the aristocratic speech yet can smirk at the foul mouthed with understanding. the scales tip and i relish every dip.
i reap the emotions of others and i do not take it lightly.

up down round an round
i have love. deep love with a man that loves me... sometimes more then i love.
there is this giant house. so big i have a whole story to myself. i tuck away all my treasures and make art out of them. my library sits aloft in it's own room, complete with curios and modern leather sittings. my office is nearly entwined with orchids and other plant life.
i have two jobs. i run my own business... which is successful, and i am second chair to the top producer in our brokerage.
i love my car. it growls when i step on the gas, it is slick, and will pull double duty as midsized suv.
life is good. even if the rescue bird we have is still cranky and the kids bicker and i am most of the time exhausted.  i love every sunrise...

*jumps hurdle*
somehow i've gotten myself to where i am now. a year ago it seemed impossible. now, NOW i am a person that i like more and more.
i'm not perfect... i still slip up but lately i have been able to tell myself no.
i went to sleep somewhere around 11 o'clock last night. i did not set my alarm and i slept until 6! i supposed my body needed a tad bit more rest. this morning i am off to the grocery store to get food stuffs for the week. I'm going to bake and cook some spooky treats and then head off to my saturday kickboxing class.

So we went to go check out a house that has been foreclosed on and I found the strangest flower growing on a hedge bordering the back of the property. They start out as these pod looking things and then burst into a flower with sticky goo and seeds inside. They have a faint scent.... and attract flies.....
I totally grabbed some seeds and I'm going to try and grow them.  =o

Tags: ,

the weather seemed to take a turn on day one. there is a hurricane lurking off the coast. it has given us cooler weather and cloudy days.  the air was free of humidity when i ran this morning.
i have an obscene amount of reading to do.  i keep hoarding away more and more and now i cannot even close the dresser drawer where i have it all hidden away. i feel like i need a vacation spent  solely on reading! i finally got a book light so at least now i can read in bed without bothering chris... not that it really bothered him too much anyway. my constant pillow theifing might though, ha ha. that has a story behind it that mildly makes it justifiable. about two years ago i kinked up the muscles in my neck sleeping (of all things). not knowing where to start in getting me repaired we went to bed bath and beyond and got me a stiffer pillow. that did no good and actually ended up aggravating me. we trekked back to BB&B and got a softer pillow. ever since then we have shared the soft pillow every night. sometimes i will fall asleep with the firmer pillow but sill end up commandeering my corner of the soft pillow by the end of the night. 
i think we are going to take some time off work soon. i would like to go to the keys but i think will will have to make a trip to houston. i might have to squeeze my trip to the keys in on a weekend.....
i look forward to my september month as i prepare for festivities to come. *wrinkles nose* it's quiet downtime to gather ideas.